The danger of raising children in The Diaspora, when you grew up in your country of origin.
I left Zimbabwe when I was 22 years old and I have been living in The Netherlands for he pas 21 years. I now have a family and going back is not planned within a day! Let alone the ticket prices for 5 people. I do realize a lot has changed, but never underestimate what a child has been exposed to. Its powerful.
Written in November 10, 2015
As a child in the village we could really play and discover a lot without anyone giving us a label. We had a lot of space to play and possibilities to discover, build and finish everything ourselves without anyone commanding. I never played alone. People here ask us as a family why we did not opt for home education. Well then I would prefer to take my children to an African village to practice in real life
Surely, I am a doubter. I do not like developmental organizations, I am a vaccination-doubter, an education system-doubter. If I had stayed in Africa, I might have died of unavoidable illnesses, but maybe not. I did stay close to my roots, close to my parents. We have learned a lot. We lived natural building our own immune system
Working in the fields, knowing all kinds of vegetables, natural medicines, species of trees, is not something an African child learn from a researched point of view, but from a day to day living and experiencing from the elderly people.
We always kept our attention to the seasons,light from the moon. Therefore we knew when to to organize ceremonies and parties in the evenings and these are mostly organized at full moon. Then you hear drums and singing in the neighborhoods. Exchanging seeds and livestock. Nobody is poor when everyone and families are help one another without questioning so no room for individualism.
And also the cattle: milking cows, goats and sheep. That was biology lesson and that was agriculture / agriculture. Without chemical additives. My parents built huts and houses of self-baked stones without asbestos or other carcinogenic additives.
Now I live in a world where I am only raising children with my husband. Sometimes very sad. What is education without your roots? To whom can you ask questions about the first teeth, or whatever.
While we made our own balls to plays from bicycle tires and recycled fabric and other organic materials in Africa. In Europe we have to join a football club and pay a fee because football an other sport activities are no longer provided in schools.
Playfully learning is doing things in practice and not being tested and labelled!
In Zimbabwe we lived with a father and a mother and we had family around us. Because of the school systems we had to go all the way to the city where I saw my mother very little. My father worked in the city and my mother lived in village. I now realize how often I have missed my mother. But those moments we were together were fruit full, because my mom was practicing what she taught us.
A lot of documentaries and researches bring us back to the bonding moments of an African parent and her children
One day I had to go to the Netherlands with my brother to continue my studies. With the goal that I would go back to my parents, unfortunately life is never in our hands. My parents passed away because of the circumstances in my homeland. this added up to my loneliness and I was further from my own roots.
Now married and I had really hoped that I would have close family outside my dear family, unfortunately the answer is no.
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Category: carrying baby, cultural differences, Culture, cultuur, Diaspora, Dragen van je kindje, Emigratie, Emotions, bonding, hechten, verbinding, verbonden, families, family, children, education, opvoeding, merry christmas, greetings, seasoning greet, wishes, best, foreigner, groceries, heavy, immigration, Intergratie, Intergratie, samenleving, Taal en kennis., Mama zijn, papa zijn, Mixed couples, televisie, vrouwen
Melissa was now living in the Netherlands, far away from home and her extended family. Perhaps it was the distance or the time away from her roots that led her down a path to reconciling her traditionally African approach to child rearing with the new modern European scientifically tested advice she was consistently receiving. In doing so she began to craft out a unique path for herself and her growing family.