Coexistence is only fun when it’s mutual

I came to the Netherlands at the end of 1994 and did not even know that there were many other groups of people living in Europe I was in Holland for 3 weeks and we stayed in because there was too much snow outside. We had never experienced snow before. My brother had applied after his study in Zimbabwe and was adopted at an international organization in the Hague. We came as expats.

One day we went to the other side of the Hague, where the market was, on advice from my brother’s colleague. So that was in the Schilderswijk. We lived in Statenkwartier, behind Frederik Hendriklaan there at the tourist. Quite an expensive district of the Hague.

It wasn’t convenient to go bycar to Hobbemastraat on Saturday because it could be very busy.

We went by the tram, tram 11 and when we approached, the market on I saw huge many other people and as I learned at school, I knew something about Asians, Africans and people from the middle east, Jamaica, Venezuela And Cuba. Bob Marley has even been to my country.

The world has opened, because I kept asking my brother and then he made books for me including the Undutchables.

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Until today, we in the south of Africa do not learn how slavery has taken place in other countries. I celebrated Sinterklaas after I met my Dutch husband He fourth that in Veenendaal and we went there on the presents.

I liked how people were connected to each other when they read the poems. I’m in favor of connection. I like it when families do things with each other. So packages night was fun to be with. But there are plenty of other ways
In 2007 before I had kids, I played black UNPAINTED Pete because I wanted to see how kids would react. I did this because I was just doubting and because I already noticed colleagues and people around me had those other colors that they weren’t happy about it. I’ve seen comments from the kids. They didn’t see me differently. I was scared. The fact that we have not done slavery history in Zimbabwe explains a lot of confusion in what is happening in the Netherlands. There are also pretty few Zimbabweans here because the embassy is in Brussels. The behavior of a Dutchman to me is different from a behavior of a french or English to me. Let alone the behavior of someone from Austria and Switzerland. Let’s get to know our past better, and look at our upbringing from then, and upbringing from now. Sometimes you can’t stick around in the past because it makes you feel good. I say, just keep making poems for each other. Connect to each other, within families and families. You’ll see that you don’t need a party to get together. In Zimbabwe, we celebrate everything. As long as there’s music, drums, and dancers. The point being:

I understand the feeling of people who have ancestors with a slavery past. One would like to see a normal society where a black woman, for example, can run her own business without having to prove extra for it.
I recently got to know a lot of Surinamese and Antillean. But also get to know a lot of Dutch people. Both sides have a story. I can’t say I’m putting a story on the side and I understand the other story. I’d rather not put myself in a booth. I’ll actually just want to see the world as one. That’s how I want to raise my children. I already do.

Well, I can speak for myself. I love connection, #bonding #familybonding #humanbonding.
It hurts me when I see that in the country where I live a lot of hate comes to each other because people are afraid of change. Look at yourself and see how many people are trying to share love. What do you like about each other, cherish that. What better? Correct each other, support each other. Keep smiling it’s not the end on the world. I see a lot of people today who go to Africa or share other world and these people come back with enormous respect for how other people live. You can’t say you know better. Can hardly ever.

Integratiecursus doesn’t work until you’re the one who’s well-known, so we call it native here.

How did it come that I can learn languages easily?

In 1998 I met my current husband and then only I got interest in Dutch society and language. Otherwise, I would have just gone back to Zimbabwe after my study and or to a country where they just have English as a language. Canada, New Zealand, or England. We spoke in English first. 3 years later I could already speak fluent Dutch and write.

Still learned how to make couscous and Asian rice o yes and pom I can make. I know the seasons of Stampotten (typical dutch food), too. That already indicates that the Netherlands is a multicultural country. Ever counted how many European people live in Africa? And that by country.

What I never did was that I was looking for fellow human beings from my native country. I didn’t need that, though I’m still homesick. Development wouldn’t be so stimulated. I’d like to learn something else, other language of the residents themselves. I’ve been seeing this for years that, now that I’ve mastered the language, I easily get in touch with a lot of people.

I don’t like organized holiday myself, I’d rather come among people. In Greece and all the other countries, people are simply to be trusted than what is being told here sometimes. A piece of autonomy.

My husband said, ” Honey, do you know why I’m so crazy about you “? you speak a bum today, you make him laugh, average person, and you make him laugh ” yesterday you just spoke the minister and in the same way And you made him laugh ” you’re a world woman.

Secretly, I was proud.

Because I control the language well, I don’t feel so soon threatened by my own fears. I understand what one means. I even went to buy the “Bartlett” and every time again the new green book.

My very first dutch teacher I remember well. Mrs. Spout, what a lovely woman that was. Every year, a good deal with “the big dictation” is delicious in front of Television and join all those difficult words. Someday I’d like to join in real. I’m now at a stage where I’m just being asked in the playground by other mothers if I was adopted. Whether I was a baby when I moved in here. Fortunately, I always say that I was born and raised in Africa. On My 22th pass, I came to live here.

I’ve been able to travel a lot through the Now I’d like to drive over the afsluitdijk! That sounds like a lot of fun! Friesland and drenthe I need to get to know even better. All the other regions I have been, partly because I took a “Zomertoerkaart” from the ns every summer and then could travel unlimited by the Netherlands. That’s great. Now I have my license, also something like that.. not born here so only later after your 30st your driver’s license.. I’ll tell you that in my next blog. I’m also grateful because I can now run my company a little better, transport kids. Even if I can do it on the bike, sometimes it’s handy. Now I travel a lot through my work, but I still don’t want to use Tomtom, then I’m so dependent again and I don’t know where I really am. I’m really not cocky hear ūüėČ.

Yet it falls to me when I have someone who is born and raised in the Netherlands the ruling my mother dares to write. So far, there was no tolerated when you write or speak wrong language.
These days with Facebook and Twitter, you can easily improve your writing skills. Still looking for the balance remains important. Because otherwise, you’re going back to the colloquial development, so then more and more people in real speak. What I am very hoping for is more correction in spelling errors, that if a friend, man or knowledge notices it immediately, it also writes the right word. That will be very nice for me.

I’ll give a tip to the one who likes to integrate. Go with the inhabitants. Are you a church man visit a church? Are you a cafe, snooker, theatre, type? Name it, save some pennies and visit the places. No money? No point, because there are plenty of volunteers who can help you to an association. Do you speak English? Make sure the residents don’t speak English to you directly. Keep asking that they speak the own language with you. Always ask for corrections, dare to speak the language and write with the mistakes. You’ll notice that one way or another you’re going to help.

That one laughs or bothers you will always run against it, it is now up to you to be strong in your shoes, because it is only for your own good.

PS. Should I have made linguistic above, please respond below with correct wording and also the correct words. Already thanks

Connected by the great shared taste!

The new menu provides the possibility of sharing. Just like what we would do in African¬† countries, eating from one plate. You will find out that that’s where great stories start. Great relationships and ideas. No more individualism. With the new Restaurant Tijsterman menu humans are connected without them planning or noticing. The quality of their food connects. Their great communication skills connects.

We came to stay in our village about 2 years ago, one thing that we always looked for, were places that we can find peace when we are tired, or find good ambiance and tasty food and drinks. Because of searching we end up connecting with the people behind the scenes.  Who then tell us the story behind. This is what fascinates me and my husband.

I remember us drinking some coffee at one of this family’s restaurant and we were immediately satisfied, not because we knew the whole menu yet. But there was a connection, Interest from both ways and that was one of the reason we came back and decide to buy our own house. The personnel is well trained such that even if they do not know, or cannot provide they will always find a way to help you out.

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In two years time we visited these family’s restaurants and cafes where we could drink selected beers and wines. This was even the best solution close to our house.

We were very honored when they surprised us by an invitation to try the¬†¬†New menu Restaurant-Tijsterman so we could provide review information. We enjoyed the tastes! we enjoyed the service and ambiance. Just like our second home. Me and my husband have always shared our diner just because we wanted to taste from each other’s plate.

What I like about their selection, is an eye on the seasons and human nature. That already shows how much respect they do have to human’s health and well being.

Below you can watch a video when my children were enjoying Mussels during the season when they are available.

My children enjoying Mussels

People who know me, know that I always talk about good food, not only health but tasty and high quality. Moving from Zimbabwe to Netherlands was not easy especially when it came to food. I was shocked about the amount of groceries people did. I was shocked about the choices I had for one type of product. How much I could find in supermarkets, too much.

Unfortunately to discover that  I had to be careful what was real and not. Most people I knew were mostly saving money on food, like they would buy the cheapest type of food in the supermarket. That never tasted the way I had known when I was young.

The most confusing part was that I would then think like I read everywhere and saw on TV that Africans were poor. I ended up not looking for the type of food I grew up eating. Food like pumpkins, and most of it what they call super – foods. The first time I visited an organic shop and a fair trade shop, I then started re appreciating my original African food.

Now that i live in a small village where the real farmers live and sell their products directly, I do feel the connection.

Even though we also adopted old British kitchen, the traditional kitchen in Zimbabwe still was the best for me as it was pure. I remember whenever I visited England or Scotland that I would pass by a traditional shop to buy typical British Cornish pastry, scones or tea. Because of travelling, I tended to like the Borough market more, even the handmade traditional food, that you can no longer find in bigger supermarkets.

Food processing killed my appetite and that made me even travel more. I visited different restaurants and ignored the fact that some have a 2 or 3 stars. I wanted to know more about who is behind the kitchen, what are their beliefs, how do they feel about what I tasted so far. I was looking for connection.
My parents definitely taught me how to taste and appreciate not just to eat because people are hungry. My father used this word culinary a lot and now I do understand what it means. I remembered my mom making lots of traditional Zimbabwean food 

So the way the Tijsterman family and their restaurant do really brings me back to my old traditional taste, organic and connection. I realized that that’s the place I like to be with my family for almost everything they do provide.

See the pictures:

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Een volslanke vrouw op de racefiets

Voordat ik moeder werd was ik nogal een mountainbike liefhebber. Ik fietste dus van Vlaardingen naar Rotterdam en natuurlijk was dat makkelijker voor mij. Ik heb het altijd leuk gevonden om in de natuur te mogen fietsen en de vrijheid te beleven.

Voor een Afrikaans meisje die opgroeide op een platteland waar de natuurlijke natuur overheerste was dit het enige compensatie die ik dan had. Alleen een beetje fietsen in de lente, zomer en misschien ook herfst als het niet al te hard waait of regent.

De interesse om de Nederlandse natuur en landschap te leren kennen heb ik nog steeds en daardoor nu ook in een van de mooiste dorpen van Nederland wonend.

Hoe ik op het idee van racefietsen kwam was via een sportschool waar ik vroeger heen ging, de Club-Fit in Vlaardingen waar Huub de spinning les gaf. De allereerste keer was best spannend, je kent het dat moment waar je tussen mensen staat die al een racefiets hebben thuis, die alle praatjes kennen van de racefiets wereld en natuurlijk de beste ritme kennen van de spinning.

Ik vond de muziek al meteen erg cool! Dat was een van de mooiste drive waarvan ik nog steeds vind dat de meeste mensen doot muziek en buiten fietsen gestimuleerd raken.

Ritme gevoel speelt inderdaad een belangrijk rol bij muziek in combinatie met spinnen. Ik vond het zoo leuk dat ik elke week toch een deel van wilde maken.

Het gevoel voor racefietsen als sport begon al in 1997 toen ik net een jaar in Nederland was uit Zimbabwe vandaan. Ik werd uitgenodigd door een van mijn studiegenoten om naar ‘s-Hertogenbosch ¬†waar ik voor het eerste de Le Tour de France heb gezien.

Ik kon opgegeven moment een racefiets kopen en dit gevoel werd ook aangesterkt door mijn man die zelf ook een Bianchi fiets heeft. We hebben toen af en toe kleine rondjes gefietst in Vlaardingen, Schiedam en het Westland. Dit vonden we het erg leuk, nu verbindt dit ons ook, want we kunnen af en toe samen de natuur in, zeker in Nieuwkoop waar wij nu wonen.

 

Mijn eerste kindje is door middel van een keizersnede geboren en de tweede ook. Ik merkte echt dat ik daardoor minder makkelijk kon sporten en bewegen.

Want na de tweede zwangerschap wilde ik weer gaan spinnen en heb het toch gedaan, we woonden inmiddels in Den Haag.

Zijn er misschien angsten of belemmeringen?

Ik zeg wel toch ja, want ik herinner me nog dat de eerste keer dat op ik mijn racefiets stapte, werd ik door bijna iedereen die ik tegenkwam bekeken. Het was net of er iets nieuws was ontstaan.

Wat ik ook niet moet vergeten te zeggen is dat dit ook erg in mij speelde omdat ik ergens aanvoel dat ik  in een maatschappij leef waar men snel elkaar oordelen. Dit niet omdat ze er wat aan kunnen doen maar omdat de Fashion of te wel mode industrie en de merken dit voor ons wel bepalen. Wanneer kan een merknaam bepalen welke type mens wel voor een bepaald activiteit is geschikt? In dit geval dus racefietsen.

Ja ik vind wel dat ik nog nooit een volslanke vrouw heb gezien op de racefiets terwijl ik best wel vind dat er genoeg zijn die dit kunnen. Veel forse vrouwen zouden best  mogen wielrennen.

Er worden geen voldoende passende maten wielrenner kleding aangeboden voor iemand die wat grotere maat heeft, terwijl wielrennen een van de hobby sport is waar je ook kunt gebruiken om fit te voelen uiteindelijk.

Wat dan als een vrouw volle rondingen heeft? Niet wielrennen?

Niks ervan, ik kan het! En ik heb best een flinke maat wat kleding betreft. We is het zo dat mijn lichaam heel mooi is getailleerd en daardoor niet altijd passend in de wielrenner broeken en de lange shirts. Weet je waarom? dan blijf het shirt steeds omhoog kruipen.

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In de bestaande winkels waar je werkelijk wielrennen kleding kan passen, zijn er bijvoorbeeld alleen broekjes die net boven je volle billen vallen. Al zou je een lang zweet shirt aan doen, blijft de broek afzakken, wegens het type beweging die je maakt tijdens het fietsen en tegelijkertijd de shirt ook nog es omhoog.

Het idee achter mijn verhaal is:

Doordat we eigenlijk gewend zijn om bepaalde zaken zo te zien, bijvoorbeeld, zogenaamde leuke kleren staan mooier bij een slanke vrouw, dus deze slanke vrouw of man is de enige ook die wij op een racefiets zien. Wordt dus dit soort beeld als de ideale beeld gezien. Daarmee doen we dan mensen zoals ik of meer mensen die graag zouden willen wielrennen te kort.

Goede conditie hebben en slank zijn, zijn twee verschillende begrippen. Toen ik  in Leidschenveen op een sportschool de spinning ruimte binnenkwam voelde ik me wel een beetje bekeken. Toen was ik zelfs nog forser na de bevalling van mijn tweede. Ik had dus best krappe spinning kleding aan. Gelukkig kon ik de ogen ontvangen en accepteren totdat ik me bewees.Maar stel je voor dat het iemand is die dat helemaal niet tegen kan. snap je nu waarom ik dit schrijf?

Maar dat zou toch niet hoeven? Vooral als iemand graag wat fitter wilt worden, dan wil je toch nog comfortabel in je sportkleding zitten? Of te wel de omgeving waar je dan de sport activiteiten doet?

Ik dacht opgegeven moment, er moet wat hieraan gebeuren, laat dit maar voor veel andere mensen en vooral vrouwen die graag willen sporten en bewegen en belemmert worden en vervolgens niet meer durven om te doen wat ze werkelijk willen doen.

Voor  mij begint alles bij passend maten daarna zijn er wellicht nog meer belemmeringen maar alles is te overkomen wat dit betreft!

Al zou je weinig aanbod krijgen omdat er weinig gevraagd worden, vind ik wel dat er rekening gehouden mag worden met eventueel volgebouwde mensen die dit sport/hobby leuk vinden.